I was recently Facebooked by a minor celebrity that I know from the gym. It kind of took me by surprise because we're not really buddy buddy or anything. In fact, our relationship doesn't extend much beyond the exchanging of pleasantries and me bumping into her every now and then at Ralphs on the late night.
I'm not going to lie, though: I feel kind of G-ish. Somebody who's regularly featured in Us magazine and other tabloids reached out to be MY e-friend -- although I'm pretty sure I owe it to our one mutual online friend. It's not like she searched for me and spelled my hard-to-spell last name right. But still...
I was pretty fucked up last night and when I'm pretty fucked up I always hop online to see what's up. Now, I'm almost positive I posted something on her wall. Nothing rude or vulgar or questionable enough to be perceived as so. I think I mentioned Ralphs and her new TV show and then spent the next five minutes proofreading and editing the comment to make sure everything flowed and didn't sound drunkish or creepy. Grammar is the one thing that doesn't change when I'm faded. You should see my text messages. Apostrophes, commas, semicolons, etc. I am on point with my English.
The comment wasn't on her wall this morning. And that bothers me because I spent time on that shit. There is no way she could have deleted it for being inappropriate.
So why did she delete it?
A quick list of possibilities:
-- She was embarrassed by me posting on her wall.
-- She was embarrassed by my comment because she doesn't want people knowing she goes to Ralphs late.
-- My comment was more than one line and looks inadvertently creepy because it's obvious I wasn't shooting from the hip, therefore making said comment seem disingenuous and a bit try-too-hardish, therefore making me look more like a fan than a friend.
-- Her status update says "Still trying to figure out Facebook" and she accidentally deleted my comment.
What's strange though is I checked my own wall and there is no record of me ever posting on her wall. Did I waste precious minutes of my hazy state scripting a comment that I never posted? Or does Facebook delete the record of a deleted comment to save you face and embarrassment if someone decides to e-stalk you and laugh to themselves that you had a comment deleted?
What do you guys think?
And yes, I realize I am way too fucking overanalytical, but that's what will put food on the table one day.